Is Performance All It's Cracked Up To Be?

Recently, I came across a reflection from Pope Leo XIV, who criticized society's obsession with performance, efficiency, and winning. He suggested that human worth is measured not by productivity, but by our capacity to love. That message stopped me in my tracks. We live in a world that constantly asks us to do more, achieve more, and prove more. Yet many of us are exhausted from trying to keep up.

I've spent much of my life competing—sometimes against others, but often against myself. Whether it was surfing, running, building a business, speaking on stages, training, or coaching clients, there was always another goal, another milestone, another measure of success. Competition can motivate us, but when it becomes our identity, we can lose sight of who we are beyond our achievements. Studies show that perfectionism, fear of failure, and constant comparison increase anxiety, drain mental energy, and make it harder for us to perform at our best. Ironically, the pressure to perform can become the very thing that prevents us from thriving.

Recently, I experienced this firsthand. I became overwhelmed by too many responsibilities, competing priorities, and a lack of clear direction. The stress built quietly until it erupted. Old trauma surfaced in my body, and suddenly I couldn't regulate myself. I tried all the techniques I teach others—breathing exercises, sipping water, grounding through my senses, noticing five things in the room. Nothing seemed to work. Looking back, I realize what I needed most wasn't another strategy. I needed permission. Permission to step back. Permission to pause. Permission to simply say, "I need space right now."

As I reflect on that experience, I see that slowing down would have made all the difference. Having a voice. Asking for what I needed. Giving myself grace instead of demanding more performance. The truth is that our value isn't found in how much we produce, how many goals we achieve, or how well we compete. Our worth is already established. We are human beings, not human doings. So if you're feeling pressure to perform, consider this your permission slip: slow the bus down. Take a breath. Rest when needed. The race will still be there tomorrow, but your peace of mind deserves attention today.